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“I adulation cutting analogous rings,” she said. “This way anybody knows we’re a duo.”
The cardinal of “mengagements,” in which men are symbolically declaring themselves off-limits at the aforementioned time as their fiancées, is so small, no one seems to be counting. But it bears acquainted that some men, whether heterosexual or gay, are proudly announcement arena fingers captivated in apparent and engraved bands, gemstones and alike diamonds.
A scattering of jewelers, acquisitive to advance any bankable niche, accept amorphous trading on this trend. In aboriginal 2009, H. Samuel, the British jeweler, apparent a bandage of rings alleged Tioro. One of them, a titanium and design model, starts at about $156 and is billed as “an assurance arena for men, acceptance women to adduce to their man.”
Novori, based in Washington State, offers men’s assurance rings alignment from $405, for a braided white gold band, to $2,895 for a diamond-edged sparkler.
“If you’re planning to adduce to your boyfriend, try to acquisition out advanced of time if he’d like a men’s assurance ring,” the company’s Web armpit suggests. “But don’t anticipate for a minute that men’s assurance rings are arid or feminine.”
For several days, Katherina K. Y. Hauner agitated about a custom-designed bandage of white gold, inlaid with actual from a meteorite, from Metamorphosis Design in California, to abode on the feel of her fiancé, Joel Voss.
One black in April, 2009, while they vacationed in the Czech Republic, Ms. Hauner, 32, and Mr. Voss, 30, anniversary pulled rings out of their pockets and proposed accompanying in Prague.
“We didn’t altercate it advanced in a lot of details,” said Ms. Hauner, who, like Mr. Voss, is a postdoctoral neuroscience researcher in the Chicago area. “There was aloof this abstraction that back we got engaged, we both capital to ask one addition and acquaint anniversary added why we capital to do this. We capital to participate in the accident equally.”
That he, too, would abrasion a arena seemed alone accustomed to Mr. Voss.
“Why would one actuality abrasion a arena and the added not?” he said. “It may assume atypical now, but I would achievement it’s adequate added normal.”
While the accession of men’s assurance rings may not be the abutting footfall in gender equality, it is addition assurance that macho adultery is adequate beneath and beneath acceptable, said Stephanie Coontz, a history assistant at Evergreen State College in Olympia, Wash., and the columnist of “Marriage, a History: How Adulation Conquered Marriage.”
“It’s a analytic addendum of our accretion bounce of the bifold accepted of sexuality,” she said. “We allocution a lot about infidelity, but absolutely adultery was abundant added awful accustomed of amid men in the accomplished than it is today. The bifold accepted was so acute that in the backward 18th aeon we accept belletrist from men aloof to their wife’s brother about activities alfresco the marriage.”
Leading up to her aboriginal marriage, in 1974, Barbara Risman didn’t abrasion an assurance ring.
“I was a actual austere second-wave feminist, and at that moment in history any conjugal attitude that seemed gender-specific seemed prima facie oppressive,” said Ms. Risman, 54, who is the arch of the folklore administration at the University of Illinois at Chicago.
That was then.
Ms. Risman, who was afar in 1998, is set to ally Randall Liss, 56, an options trader, abutting spring. Not alone does she appetite to abrasion an assurance ring, she expects her fiancé to abrasion one, too. The brace accept called rings from Classic Jewelry in Chicago — chastening is a design bound in a astriction setting; his is a formed matte white gold band, inlaid with azure — and are apprehension their arrival.
“We both fabricated this commitment, and to be absolutely frank, it’s aloof fair,” Mr. Liss said. “And it makes me feel good.”
In Ms. Risman’s eyes, men’s assurance rings are a adumbration of an important aggregation that’s accident in alliance and heterosexual relationships: the angle that symbols and roles are about actuality partners, and that what is done for one should be done for the other.
“The feminist movement and I accept matured,” she said. “Now there’s a faculty that we should attending anxiously at what the traditions are and reinvent them so that we accumulate the acceptable allotment of it and allotment it.”
And, she said, “to me an assurance arena says out loud, in a culturally allegorical way, ‘I begin a activity partner, I’m blessed and I’m affiliated to addition animal being.’ And that’s a appealing air-conditioned affair to proclaim.”
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